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Making a BIG Decision

June 24, 2007

So, within the next few days, I need to make a decision about a 1-year commitment.

On Friday, I was offered a job teaching math for the Daniel Academy. The Daniel Academy is a homeschool coop of sorts that is launching this fall. The vision of the school so amazingly fits the vision and dream that I have been carrying in my heart related to teaching. It is an opportunity to help a community of homeschooling students pursue excellence in prayer, fasting, and learning. (And it even makes use of the thing that I decided to spent 4 years studying in college… weird.)

However, I have all sorts of fears and hesitations. And there are some significant sacrifices that I would have to make. To name a few of these “maybe not” factors in the decision-making process…

1. Leaving the Night Watch

I wouldn’t have to completely leave the night watch. However, my class would be at 11am (and a good drive away), so I would not be able to stay later than 2am every night. Yeah… that means I can “stay up late” for about a third of the night watch. (I probably WOULD stay until 4am on Friday and Saturday nights.) I have talked to Clay and Stuart and I would still be able to stay on Clay’s team. So… it might be doable. But it’s still a huge thing for me. A significant change.

2. No Backing Out

I would be signing a one-year contract. So if things got to be too much, I would still be locked in for a year. Which means that either the bookstore or my remaining scrap of night watch would have to give.

3. Grieving

A grief councelor recommended that I make a trip to Texas in August. This would be for my mom’s birthday and the 6-month mark since her death. However, my mom’s birthday is right in the middle of the second week of school. Horrible timing! If 6 months and her birthday are anything like 3 months and mother’s day, I am likely to be somewhat less than functional during the first two weeks of classes. Yikes!

4. What if I fail

There are always those fears of being unqualified and of doing a horrible job. And my mom isn’t here to talk me out of those fears.

5. Too much on my plate

It is quite possible that this commitment could end up being more than I can handle when you throw in all of the other things that I am doing and desire to continue doing. My team, the bookstore, Richard’s class, prayer room hours, and so on. I am having trouble figuring out something that I could call an actual day off. And a day off is important. So it would require some serious work to find a doable schedule.

And the list goes on…

I beg for your prayers and I welcome your input. Especially if you have any dreams, visions, angelic encounters, audible voice of the Lord experiences, or run-ins with a burning bush.

I’m pretty sure I know what God is saying on this. I need to choose and He will back me either way. I think I know what I am going to do. But we are still working on the courage and confidence to walk forward in it. And I need to move past those freaking out moments that keep happening ever since I got offered the job. (I woke up this morning feeling completely unsettled about the whole thing.)

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5 comments

  1. Christine,

    First of all I’m praying with you about all of this. Secondly, I know that you are qualified mentally and can do whatever is put before you. You just have the gift to pick up on what needs to be done and do it well. You may fail…so what, the important thing is to keep moving forward with the Lord. He is calling you to something then he is also with you and knows the course ahead and all it involves. Keep your eyes on him…let him guide you. I will pray more about this and just want you to know I love you. I miss you so much. Wish I could just give you a big hug right now…although an angelic visitation would probably be more preferred… 🙂


  2. Oh by the way, your more than equipped spiritually as well…LOL…sorry to have left this off. Ok. I’m done for real.

    Blessings.


  3. Christine,

    that sounds so weird, I still want to call you
    Chris. Anyway, I hope I can say this right, Its hard to put into words and I don’t want to confuse you even more or over step my bounds. I’m no grief couneclor and maybe they know more than I do, but, I have been in your shoes somewhat. Yes, we did know our mother was going, but it is still a great loss. There are so many things that I wish I would have done differently. We all deal with grief in differnt ways and knowing what your mother would have wanted had she known, would help. Had our mother not passed away, your father and I would not have met and married the people that we did. Sometimes moving on, no matter how painful, is what God wants us to do. I think you knew your mother better than anyone, you were her light and her sunshine. What do you think she would want you to do?


  4. you know, i think you can do it. and i’m writing this note knowing that you actually said yes, so the encouragement is kind of one of those “well, now you have to anyway, so at least you should know that i find you completely capable. and rather qualified, for what it’s worth. i support you.” comments.

    so, yes. go team! you can do it!


  5. I just checked out the web site. Holy smokes, that’s a pretty powerful vision. Cool. I encourage any of you who haven’t to go and check it out.

    Oh, and you’ll be awesome, as usual. It was cool to see and hear your excitement while you were here and I know that you’ll do very well. Seeing what the Academy is about, I can’t imagine anyone better suited to be a part of it.



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