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My Downfall… Parenthetical Statements.

August 19, 2008

My parenthetical statements have a great potential to get me in trouble. Somehow, when I blog, there is something about putting a statement in parentheses that appears to almost lower my standards for what is and isn’t okay to say.

Well… I did it again.

I recently wrote a post about something a little too quickly. The situation was painful for me. I was feeling very hurt, and wrote the post while experiencing the heights of those emotions.

When coming out of a situation where another person’s words or actions have hurt you… it’s probably a good idea to assume that your emotions are clouding your discernment and conclude that it would be safer not to write about it.

(Unless you’re writing in a private journal. By all means… say whatever the heck you want to say in your journal. The honesty is probably good for you and God can definitely handle it. It’s not like you’re giving God any new insight, and you might be surprised by some of the things that you say when you let your heart out on paper.)

Looking at the rest of the post, I still feel really good about it. All of it… except that silly little parenthetical statement.

So, this post is something of a retraction. Upon honest reflection, I am realizing that my parenthetical statement was really directed at two people.

If you have no idea what I am talking about (don’t go looking for it, it’s gone), don’t worry about it. Just take this post as my little confession of profound weakness.

If you know what statement I am referring to, but don’t know what the situation is, please be satisfied to remain in your state of confusion and perplexity. My parenthetical statement actually served no purpose in the overall goal of my post and really should never have existed. It was just a passive-aggressive lashing out at the two people who had hurt me.

If you know exactly what I am talking about and the situation to which it refers, I apologize for sliming you with my unbridled blog-speech. I was intentionally vague in hopes of no one being in this category, but people are generally more intelligent than that, and this particular statement certainly wasn’t vague enough to keep this very private issue private.

If you are the two people that I publicly unleashed my passive-aggressive fury upon, I truly am sorry. I so blindly trudged forward in my sin and weakness that I was actually shocked when the blog was mentioned. (Though the statement referred to did pretty immediately come to mind.) But, as I look back at it and reflect upon the decision that I made when I added those words, it is pretty obvious that I was directing the statement at you. I apparently lack the courage and maturity to confront those areas of offense in a healthy and righteous manner. I could try to make all sorts of excuses for my immaturity and try to justify my cowardice, but they are what they are. I have sinned against you and I hope that you can forgive me for the action. I certainly hope that I really am learning from this situation and will not again do this to you, or any other person, for that matter. (Though I know this is not the first time that this has happened. God, help me to actually grow beyond this.)

At, at last, I am issuing an invitation. If you are ever reading this blog and you feel that I have crossed a line somewhere… please let me know.

I have a handful of people who are in my life and read my blog who have that liberty already. But the reality is, sometimes things get through that shouldn’t. (Or, perhaps, those people catch it but don’t know how to tell me that I am in error.)

Reading my blog should never come with the risk of being slimed by something that I say. As I am learning to truly bridle my speech… I need the help of those who have the courage to tell me when I blindly cross a line somewhere.

Again, I apologize and earnestly pray that my words will strengthen, encourage, and provoke others to righteousness. Without all of that other junk in the mix.

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